Nessie and the Viking

I was in the Scottish highlands doing some hiking
I reached Loch ness where I spotted a viking
He was all caught up in a battle with Nessie
He could've used a comb because his beard was so messy
He raised his sword and began to yell
You could tell this viking was giving Nessie hell
He fought and screamed and pounded his chest
This viking was better than the rest
Next thing I knew, Nessie made a bad move
It appeared that this viking was getting in his groove
He slashed and stabbed and dodged and ducked
Anyone could have seen that Nessie was fucked
Mr. Viking went "CUT" and it was off with the head
Nessie's body floated in the water clearly dead
The viking had Nessie's head as a trophy for his wall
But the viking was a warrior much different from all
He used physics to help him win the fight
And his sword was ceramic; he made it one night
He then let out a victorious belch
And that was how I met Mr. Welsch